Week 9: Running While Black

Day 1: 8 Miles                  Time: 1:32:44

Remember how I was supposed to run 8 miles on Sunday? Ya know, like, yesterday?  Yea, so that didn't happen.  

I really just didn't feel like running.  Not even a little bit.  I have a bad habit of doing everything at the last minute.  Which I guess isn't a bad habit because last minute tasks inspire efficiency.  So of course I decided to run 8 miles before I packed for a 4-day conference; I needed to be at my pickup location by 12 noon.  I woke up at 8am and ran 8 miles.....I had NOTHING packed.  I still need to shower and get ready afterward, AND walk Sadie.  I have no idea how I function sometimes.  

Moving on, this actually was a REALLY good run.  I had anticipated dying around mile 5 and giving up around mile 6.  Nope, I made it 6.5 Miles before I decided to walk for a minute to give my knees a break since they start to throb at 6 miles.  I've been trying to consistently run 6.5 miles before stopping; this way I can for sure run half of the race.  I was feeling so good that I basically walked for 2 minutes and ran the last 2.25 miles without stopping.  I was ZOOMING through these miles!!!

Mile 1: 11:14 

Mile 2: 10:50

Mile 3: 11:12

Mile 4: 11:09

Mile 5: 11:32

Mile 6: 11:42

Mile 7: 12:34

Mile 8: 12:20

By mile 7 I remembered that I wanted to run a 12 minute pace, and like any other lazy person,  I slowed down.  I thought to myself, we have a couple minutes to spare, we can slow down homie.  

But then, I got bored.  The one thing I'm good for, is speeding up during any workout in order to get done quicker.  Sadie was tired, I was nervous that I wouldn't have enough time to half ass pack, had to speed it up just a tiny bit at the end.  I was feeling GWOOD.  I was energized and feeling like I could conquer the day.  

Day 2: REST                     Time: 00:00

Like I said, I was at a 4-day conference.  I don't know about you all, but I Can't hop from meeting to meeting for 8 hours nonstop without being exhausted.  I got back to my room, this smedium ass dorm room, and passed out.

Day 3: 5 Miles                   Time: 52:15

I'm not a fan of running in places that I'm not familiar with.  It makes me super uncomfortable to not have familiarity with the environment or culture of places that I'm working out in.  One, I have no clue what awful things may or may not happen in those places, and two, I don't know dese people.  

I decided to run at night because I didn't want to be late for any of my sessions and it was too hot to run during the day.  It was daylight when I started walking to the outdoor track at 8:30pm.  I HATE walking around new places by myself.  I'm a woman, I'm black, and I'm not the most feminine (people use this as an indicator of sexuality for some strange reason).  All 3 of those identities inspire people to say and do interesting things when we cross paths or have to interact.  I received some interesting looks when I walked onto the track, none that would cause me to leave, though.

So boom, after a good stretch I get right to it.  I don't know if that track just runs fast (has a bounce to it), or if I was running scared.  But ummmm, homegirl was hauling ass today.  

 Mile 1: 10:10 

Mile 2: 10:24

Mile 3: 10:34

Mile 4: 10:33

Mile 5: 10:29

Normally I'm nervous to run a 10 minute mile because I'm usually really tired after it.  When the little voice from the Nike Running App announced my time for the first mile I was hella confused.  Like, hold up, you said what??? I had so many questions lol.  Which is good when you're running because they'll preoccupy your thoughts and make the run go by quicker.  I just assumed it was because I was nervous from being in Ohio (a very white, very conservative, anti-black folk state).  Maybe not, maybe I was just feeling good?

This older woman sat on the bleachers with who I assume was her grandson, and just watched me.  Each lap she followed me with her eyes.  By the time I finished she asked me how far I'd run, after I told her she just smiled a big smile and told me to keep going.  I don't know whose grandma or aunty she is but she made me feel so good.

During my entire walk back to my room I felt really uncomfortable.  I was being gawked at by people, and I had a strange feeling it wasn't because I was running fast.  Walking back to the dorm that I was staying in I felt even more uncomfortable.  There was a heavy police presence that gave me pause.  There were also a lot of young, undergraduate white men walking at this time.  It was dark as f#$% and that in itself is a red flag.  Being Black in predominantly white spaces and locations has always made me pay close attention to my surroundings.  It only takes one movement, one hoodie, one assumption, to become the next hashtag.  I'm medium height (considered tall by some), muscular build, a short-natural haircut, Black, and wearing a hoodie....at night.  Walking by the first group of young men I could feel them staring through my soul.  As a woman, the most nerve wrecking thing to do is walk past or through a group of men by yourself.  The second group made a few nasty comments, nothing new.  I finally made it back to my room and decided to stay put after dark until I got back to my own save haven in Ypsi.  

Day 4: REST                       Time: 00:00

Last day of the conference = driving from Ohio to Michigan.  Sitting in cards for long periods of time makes my knees lock up.  So uhhh, no running or working out for me today :)

Day 5: 3 Miles                    Time: 34:13

Hopped on a treadmill and struggled.  Not sure why I was so tired while running but I was.  I kept telling myself that as long as I don't go over 36 minutes we're good.  I truly hate that some weeks I run the short distances super quick, and then the next week it's like my legs forgot how fast they can move lol Treadmills are also just also machines and I don't see how people ever run for long periods of time on them.

Day 6: Cross Train               Time: 00:00

Run Fun!!!

Every Saturday I go to Ypsilanti High School (10am) to do some running and a quick workout.  This past week we did suicides.....on the bleachers.   How do you even do those???  You run up one flight of stairs, then run to the end of the bleachers.  Then you run to the next flight of stairs, and back to the end of the bleachers....repeat until you've gone up all of the flights.  But it didn't stop there.  Once we did 4 flights of stairs, we did a quick circuit: Squats, Flutter Kicks, Jumping Jacks, and Lunges.  There was a plank involved but we kept sliding so that was a no go.  We did this for 3 rounds.  For 3 rounds I got fussed at while running up some stairs LMAO

It was all worth it in the end.  They actually survived and we were good to go.

Day 7: 9 Miles                     Time: 1:45:37

So let me start this by saying I was TERRIFIED to even start the run.  I loathe failure and I hate quitting and I had a bad feeling that I was gonna quit halfway through this run.  I didn't feel like running because I NEVER feel like running on Sundays....EVER.  I hate it so much.  

Sundays are the days that I lounge around my apartment and irritate Sadie.  Nope, on this lovely Sunday I had to do laundry, go grocery shopping, AND go to work in place of one of my students.  But I got off my butt at the most inconvenient time and started trotting.  I made sure to run slower than usual because I wasn't sure if I was actually gonna survive the run.  I brought my MCard with me in case I needed to catch the bus home.

Mile 1: 10:47

Mile 2: 11:06

Mile 3: 11:20

Mile 4: 11:29

Mile 5: 11:23

Mile 6: 11:52

Mile 7: 12:36

Mile 8: 12:41

Mile 9: 12:12

Same story as earlier, I was running well and made it to 6.5 miles.  NOW, this time I was actually in an ALL WHITE neighborhood running with a hoodie on.  I got to 4.25 miles and had to run through a park...while a soccer game was happening.  For those of you who don't know, I have severe anxiety.  Meaning the tiniest of tasks can become HUGE because of my anxiety, like running past a ton of White people that are staring at me like they're seeing a UFO.  They stared at me as if I was a foreigner but not once acknowledged this woman walking around in what looked like a dinosaur onesie.  I zoomed outta that park.  The entire time I was running I was gawked at.  By people sitting on benches in parks, by people driving by, by people walking by, BY EVERYONE.  At one point an older White man asked as I jogged "ya know where you are sweetheart?".  For those who don't know, the one thing you don't want to hear as a person of color is someone asking if you know where you are.  Especially if where you are has american flags dangling from every porch on every block.  It all screams patriotism and some people's patriotism means "I don't like niggers".  Some of you may think it's paranoia but it's a "normal" everyday worry that some of us as Black people have to deal with EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

Anyway, I barely survived the run.  I made it to 6.5 miles and damn near wanted to stop for good.  I walked a quarter mile and then ran 1 mile.  Walked another quarter mile and then ran a half mile.  I finally got to the last stretch and struggled me way home.  MY KNEES WERE THROBBING!!!  The left one felt like it was locking up and the right one felt like a water balloon.  I basically crawled into my apartment and laid on the floor.  I sweat through a thick hoodie...a thick sorority hoodie people!!!  And had to get off my ass and shower so I could make it to work on time.  The struggle was mad real.  BUT, I did it :)